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How to start a love letter.

The first line of a love letter is the hardest. Twenty openers that sound like a person instead of a card, sorted by what the letter is for, plus what to avoid.

By Chris, NotAText · Updated October 15, 2026 · 2 min read

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Her name, a comma, and one plain sentence about why you are writing. That is the opening. Everything on this page is a version of it.

The rule

The first line should be something you would actually say if she walked in while you were writing. "Dearest, my heart overflows" is not that. "I've been meaning to write this for a year" is.

When there is no occasion

  1. No reason. I was thinking about you.
  2. I'm bad at saying this out loud, so here it is on paper.
  3. This is going to be short because I only have one thing to say.
  4. I saw a dog that looked like yours and now you're getting a letter.
  5. Nothing happened today. That's why I'm writing.

When it is the first one

  1. I've never written one of these, so bear with me.
  2. I don't know how to start this so I'm just going to start.
  3. You said once that nobody writes letters anymore. So.

When it is an anniversary or birthday

  1. Three years. Here's the one I keep thinking about.
  2. Everybody else is going to tell you happy birthday. I want to tell you about March.
  3. I was going to buy a card and then I read the cards.

When she is far away

  1. It rained here today, the sideways kind, and you'd have run straight through it.
  2. Forty-one days. Here's what you missed this week.
  3. You're probably on the couch with the gray blanket. Stay there.

When it is an apology

  1. I was wrong Friday. Here's exactly how.
  2. This isn't an explanation. You've heard those. This is the other thing.

When you know she will roll her eyes

  1. I know. A letter. Roll your eyes and then keep reading.
  2. Before you say anything: yes, I'm the kind of person who writes letters now.
  3. You can throw this away after. You won't, but you can.
  4. Read this somewhere nobody's watching.

What to avoid

  • "Dearest," "My darling," "My love," unless you say those out loud.
  • "Words cannot express…" Then why are you writing?
  • Anything you found by searching "romantic opening lines."
  • Starting with "I." Five of these do, and that is fine, but the openers that start with her, the weather, or the dog are the ones that feel like a person.

Then what

After the opener: one moment, one thing you notice, one thing you want, a sign-off. The whole method is in how to write a love letter. When it is written, type it at NotAText and a real pen puts it on paper; we mail it for you. Send it handwritten.

Questions

Do I have to write “Dear”?

No. Her name and a comma is a complete greeting. Use “Dear” if it is how you would actually address her.

Should I start with “I love you”?

End with it, if you say it. Starting with it leaves the rest of the letter with nowhere to go.

What if I use a nickname?

Use the nickname. It is the most “you” thing on the page.

Write it tonight. She keeps it for years.Type it on your phone. A real pen writes it. We mail it from Abilene, Texas.
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